Miss Manners: How to respond when asked if I breastfeed my kids?

I recognize that this is 2024, and many people have put forth a huge amount of effort to promote breastfeeding as a best practice for babies and young toddlers. But people I barely know, women and men alike, will ask me if I am breastfeeding my children. I am a fairly private person, and I don’t really like to talk about my private body parts around people other than my husband or a medical professional. While breastfeeding is now celebrated, breasts themselves remain a private part of a woman’s body, do they not? Advertisement It’s not just because this involves your bosom (as Miss Manners delicately puts it) that this is an outrageously intrusive question. It is designed to lead to lectures on the subject — chastising you if you are not breastfeeding, or probing further if you are. Do they look hungry?” Oh, dear, another snarky comeback. Miss Manners sometimes hears from Gentle Readers who prefer that even casual rudeness be hashed out with frank expressions of everyone’s feelings, preferably with the help of therapists. But if we analyzed and sought to punish every bit of thoughtlessness, we would hardly have time for anything else. It is easier to dismiss such things with a flip remark or, if you prefer, just a shocked stare. Dear Miss Manners: My spouse and I received a substantial cash gift from my parents to celebrate our elopement. Typically, when I receive a gift or stay in someone’s home, I mail a thank-you note the next day so I don’t forget. Advertisement In this case, I truly cannot recall if I sent one or not. Not that you forgot to mark it, but that you think of it as a set exchange: one present, one letter of thanks. What Miss Manners suggests instead is some version of, “Liam and I know how lucky we are to have your support — not only for your very generous present, but also for your emotional support and your fine example.” And so on. They are not going to read such a letter and then say, “But she already thanked us.” New Miss Manners columns are posted Monday through Saturday on washingtonpost.com/advice. You can send questions to Miss Manners at her website, missmanners.com. – This Summarize was created by Neural News AI (V1). Source: https://www.washingtonpost.com/advice/2024/09/03/miss-manners-breastfeeding-ask-private/